Beg Me Read online

  "You still play the guitar?" she asked.

  "Hell, yes. I jam by myself usually, but Rick hooked me up with three other guys who like to play. We meet once a week."

  "I'm glad. There was something about you when you played guitar."

  "I looked cool, right? You wanted me?"

  Cara laughed. "I always wanted you, Rem. No, it was this sense of freedom. Pure joy in your face. I could watch you for hours."

  He tilted his head and studied her. "The last few women I dated rolled their eyes and called me a Peter Pan. They didn't get it."

  "They didn't get you."

  The jolt of connection sizzled. He pulled his gaze away, and took a long pull of his beer. "Tell me about your teaching. Rafe's girlfriend teaches at Lakeside Elementary."

  "Great school. I actually work for a private institution. Sommerset Park. The classes are small, and I have a lot of support. I feel like I can do my job well. Get to know the kids on a personal basis."

  "Do you still volunteer at animal shelters? Take in strays?"

  "I do. I spend Saturdays helping out, and fostering senior dogs when I can."

  "Remember those feral cats you were determined to help? They scared the hell out of me. Yet, they came to you like you were their mother."

  Her eyes glowed from the memory. "They were born under the front porch. The poor mother was so scared. It took me forever to get her to trust me."

  "She used to hiss and snarl when I came to visit you."

  Cara giggled. "Such a big, bad, Dom. You used to wait in the car and call me out because you were afraid to come in."

  He glowered. "I've heard of mother cats killing men before to protect their young."

  "At least I got them all homes eventually."

  "You always did want to save the world," he murmured.

  Cara gave a long sigh. "I learned I can't. But if I take it one by one, I can make a small difference."

  "You made a difference to me."

  She reached out and took his hand. His strong fingers closed around hers. "Sometimes, when we're like this, it feels like yesterday. Doesn't it?"

  He nodded and squeezed her hand. "Yes. But it's not."

  "That's better," she said. "I wouldn't want what we had before."

  "Was it that bad?"

  She flinched and glared. "Of course not! But we're not the same people, and we owe ourselves something bigger and better."

  "Cara--"

  "But I just want to be friends."

  "So you said. How does this friendship thing work?"

  She gave a cheeky grin, knowing she had a shot at this. Rem wanted an excuse to see her, so she'd give it to him. "No sex, of course. We hang out and do some fun stuff together. No pressure."

  His brows snapped in a frown. Cara giggled as frustration simmered around him. Obviously, he hated not being in control of this relationship, but it was the only way to get his guard down and allow him to really see her. "I don't know."

  "Will you give it a try?" she asked seriously. "Please?"

  He considered. Cara knew Rem took his time with problems. His sharp intellect allowed him to look at the issue from different angles before making a decision. She figured she'd have to wait it out, but suddenly, he gave her the answer.

  "Okay. I'll try."

  She beamed at him. "Thanks."

  His slow smile warmed her heart and gave her hope.

  There was still a chance.

  Chapter Nine

  "FUCK! HE PEED ON MY LEG!"

  "Oh, he didn't mean it. Harry just smelled the other dogs on you. He gets confused."

  Rem stared at the mottled mutt staring adoringly up at Cara. And then he saw it. She scratched his ears, turned, and Harry shot him a disgusted, snotty look. The dog practically sneered before flicking his attention away from Rem like he was beneath regard and no competition.

  Son-of-a-bitch.

  Harry wanted Cara to himself.

  "Cara!"

  She turned back, juggling three leashes. "What?"

  Rem pointed to the mutt. "He did that on purpose! He's mad because you gave him to me. He wants you for himself."

  She gave him a pitying look. "Sure, Rem. I'm positive Harry has this big master plan to make your life torturous just because he wants to own me himself."

  Oh, shit.

  He sounded ridiculous. Still, one more glance at the mutt told Rem all he needed to know. The dog had a plan, alright, and Rem needed to keep an eye on him. "Come on, Harry," he said nicely. He'd try. For Cara's sake. After all, the dog didn't have a forever home. "Let's take a nice walk in the woods."

  The dog looped his way around Rem's legs a few times, then tried to yank him off his feet.

  Rem stumbled, tripped, and managed to avoid the tangle to keep the leash in his hold. Harry opened his mouth in an evident doggy sneer.

  "Okay, Harry. I've had enough of you. This trip is gonna be a one way ticket into the woods like Hansel and Gretel."

  "Rem!"

  Ah, shit.

  Cara's eyes widened with horror. Harry saw his opportunity and went into a crouch, whining pitifully like he'd been abused. "Here." She thrust the white French poodle's leash into his hand and grabbed Harry's. "Maybe you're not a good fit for him. He's had a hard life and needs a gentle hand."

  Harry gave a nice doggy sigh.

  Yeah. This friends thing was a real blast.

  Somehow, she'd convinced him to help her out at the local pet shelter for the annual dog walk. Though he pointed out walking a bunch of dogs in a hundred degree heat wasn't a fun, friendly thing to do, her dedication and passion for rescues won out over his grumpiness. Rem had forgotten how enthusiastic and positive she was with lost causes. It was another thing that had made him easily fall in love with her.

  As Cara led him and a few others down the trail for the official rescue walk, Rem admitted the past few weeks had been nice. When Cara first approached him about being friends, he'd been leery. How did he switch from hot, dirty sex to a hands-off relationship? How could he be friends with a woman he'd once loved and felt betrayed by? But one look at her eager face made him want to try.

  After all, he'd originally believed their one night together would cure him forever. Rem figured he'd put the past behind and finally move on.

  Instead, their one night had the opposite effect. Her touch and taste was permanently imprinted on his mind and body. Her offer of friendship could be the answer. Maybe he could end up getting the best parts from her, and let go of the others. They'd always been so close in other ways besides the physical. If Rem opened himself up to the possibility, maybe friendship would be the best thing for both of them.

  So far, things were going well. They went to the movies and munched out on popcorn, Raisinets, Slurpees, and then got sick. Sometimes after work, she stopped by and they strolled the mall together, sipping Starbucks and getting lost in the bookstore. Last night, they ate at a dive bar with a great local metal band, and ended up rocking out till dawn. Today, he'd met her at ten am and she put him right to work.

  Rem was impressed. The other volunteers looked to her as a leader, and she took on the role with grace and warmth, from how she spoke to the public, treated the dogs, and kept everyone moving and on task.

  She was Cara, but better. She didn't hesitate or question herself endlessly anymore. She didn't look to him for answers, or guidance. This woman knew what had to be done and owned herself -- every part. How many times had her body issues broken his heart? He'd try to tell her how beautiful she was but she never truly believed it.

  Those years away, she'd found herself. Claimed her beauty. Owned her soul.

  It was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen in his life.

  Rem figured he wouldn't like not being in charge all the time. He was so focused on having a full-time sub who would take his lead on all issues, he never thought about being in a relationship with a woman who only submitted in the bedroom. With Cara, it was nice to have a partner. She held her own, on every
level, and Rem didn't have to be on all the time. It was kind of nice.

  Not that it mattered, of course.

  They were just friends.

  Damn. He really wished he didn't want to fuck his new friend so bad.

  The French poodle -- Lacey? -- walked nicely on the leash and didn't give him any back talk. Rem followed the trail, enjoying the view of Cara's tight jeans and full ass swinging back and forth. The volunteers chattered, laughed, and hid beneath the sting of the sun by heading into a nest of trees and letting the dogs go crazy with a variety of scents. Cara kept up a steady dialogue of what the DogCrazy animal shelter did, how many rescues it took care of, and what fostering entailed. He enjoyed listening to her voice, the dancing lilt and infused warmth that was part of who she was.

  Lacey tried to hook up with a variety of studs, but unfortunately they seemed more interested in the excitement of the walk. Rem held back a laugh. Trying to get some action and getting rejected must be tough for a canine.

  Poor little bitch.

  "Uh, oh. I don't even want to know what thought you just had."

  Cara stared at him with pure suspicion. Somehow, he'd been daydreaming and didn't catch her dropping back to match his stride. "You probably don't want to know."

  "Try me."

  "Umm, dog sex."

  "Yeah, I don't want to know."

  He burst into laughter. The sun exploded rays in her hair and lit them to fire. She smelled like earth and wild flowers. He tamped down an urge to lean forward and take a big sniff of her skin. Friends probably didn't do stuff like that.

  Harry shot him a look of disgust, pulling on his leash to make Cara go faster.

  "Do you have a dog?" he asked.

  "No. I foster sometimes to help out the shelter, but I haven't made the leap yet. It's a big responsibility so I want to be sure."

  "Yeah, Rome has a dog named Bella. She's a golden lab. He's crazy about her."

  "I'd love to see your brothers again," she commented, stopping as Harry stuffed his nose in a pile of dirt. "But they probably hate me. I wouldn't blame them."

  "They don't hate you, Cara. When I told them we spent the night together, they said we'd both made mistakes. I think they're right."

  She groaned. "Oh, God, you told them we slept together? Now I'm really embarrassed."

  "Why? Rafe was the one who hooked me up with FANTA-C. They all met their mates there."

  "All of them? Wow, that's some serious juju."

  She settled into quiet, and Remington spotted the faraway look she usually got when she was trapped in a memory. His heart ached, and he fought the urge to reach out and take her in his arms. Cuddle her close. How was it being with Cara soothed that restlessness that constantly haunted him?

  No, he had to be careful. They both needed boundaries.

  Maybe he'd go the club Chains tonight. It had been a long time between visits, but if he could find a sexy sub to entertain him and take his mind off fucking Cara, he may find some peace.

  They finished the walk, and everyone gathered for a barbecue. He munched on hot dogs and hamburgers, helping at the grill, and distributing flyers to the crowd. Lacey hung by his side, chilled out, not needing a man to complete her.

  As the day wound down, Cara trudged over with Harry cuddled in her arms. His chin rested on the generous curve of her breast. His gaze narrowed at Rem as they moved closer.

  "Ready to wrap up and head home?" he asked. "I have an early shift in the morning."

  His heart stuttered as she treated him to a full-blown smile with blinding white teeth. He almost stumbled back under the sheer power of feminine energy packing a punch. "I'm ready. So is Harry."

  He cocked his head. "Huh?"

  "That's the news! I'm adopting Harry! He's coming home with me."

  Ah, shit.

  Chapter Ten

  "YOU WERE WITH CARA AGAIN? Walking dogs?" Rick asked.

  Rem shrugged and put up his hand to the cocktail waitress. His draft was quickly re-filled, and he faced his brother, Rick, who had a very nice handful sitting in his lap. Namely Tara Denton, the love of his life. Her silvery blonde hair made her look like an angel, and Rem believed she was damn close. "It was for the rescue shelter. She kind of convinced me to be a volunteer."

  Rafe spit out a laugh. "Dude, you've never walked dogs for anyone else but her. So, what's the deal? It's been a few weeks and you always seem to be making plans with her. You two hooked up again?"

  Rem glared. His other brother had his arms wrapped firmly around his current lover, Summer Preston. With her high ponytail, innocent face, and girl-next-door looks, no one would ever expect she was a wicked Dominatrix who'd beaten his brother and loved him like no other. Rem respected the hell out of her. She led the life she wanted, and finally convinced his brother to do the same. As former military, Rafe had been intent on ignoring his submissive side, afraid his family wouldn't understand.

  Stupid. Rem respected the beauty of domination and submission on both sides, and it didn't matter whether the role was male or female. At least, Rafe had finally learned to embrace his real self.

  Rem happened to love them already like sisters, so he hoped his brothers ended up making it official.

  The ladies leaned forward. "Rem, is this the woman you dated through college?" Tara asked.

  "That's the one."

  "The one who stomped on your heart and left you for dead?" Summer asked with a protective frown.

  He laughed. "Not really. Rafe has to do a better job explaining the intimate details of my past. Nothing like your brothers spilling your dirty laundry."

  Tara waved her hand in the air. "We'd never share your secrets. It's in the circle of trust."

  Rick tugged her hair playfully. "Hmm, seems you've been watching too many movies and not enough studying."

  "I got an A-on my last test!"

  "It should've been an A."

  Rafe rolled his eyes. "Yeah, like you're a perfectionist, Rick. I saw your station before. It was a bit of a mess. Pop would've kicked your ass."

  Tara giggled.

  Rem figured this was a perfect time for his announcement. "Cara and I are friends now. I invited her to join us for a drink tonight."

  Silence fell at the table.

  "Friends?" Rick repeated. "Are you kidding me?"

  "You're not sleeping with her?" Rafe asked in confusion.

  "Nope. We're just friends."

  "Who's friends?" Rem groaned at the sound of Rome's voice. Sloane greeted everyone and slid into the leather booth with a glass of sparkling water. Her dark good looks, and no-nonsense attitude screened a brilliant mind. As "The Queen of Cards" she made millions on the circuit and had just got back from another tour.

  "Cara and Rem are now friends," Rafe filled in.

  "Not the Cara who broke your heart and abandoned you?" Sloane asked.

  "Is there anyone at this table that doesn't know my personal shit?" he grumbled.

  "No," Rome said.

  "Dude, you're screwed up," Rick said. "First you said you'd never see her again after the FANTA-C date. Now you're suddenly sneaking around, walking dogs, as friends. Why don't you both try again? It's obvious you're into her."

  Rem glared and jabbed his finger at his brothers. "Stay out of this. "

  Summer spoke up. "Rem is right, it's none of our business."

  "I agree," Sloane said. "Hey, maybe you can take her to Chains?"

  Rem choked on his beer. "No way. I know she had Paul teach her, but I'm sure she's ready to pull out of the club scene. I think we both needed FANTA-C to close the door on the past, and start fresh. But not together."

  Silence fell again.

  As he glanced around the table, he received sympathetic stares that told him one thing. He was a big chump.

  "Well, this is a quiet table."

  He looked up. Cara stood next to him, shifting her weight from foot to foot in her trademark gesture of nerves. Rem stood and gave her a half-hearted hug, feeling on display as
the crowd in the booth took everything in. Sometimes, family was a real pain in the ass.

  "I'm glad you can make it." He quickly made introductions to the girls, but his brothers surprised him. They slid out of the booth and caught up Cara in big bear hugs.

  "You look great," Rick said. "All grown up."

  Cara laughed and blushed. "You guys, too. I cannot believe I've been in Vegas over a year and never ran into you!"

  Rome motioned to Rick. "Started with this guy, and one by one, he dragged us out here. Whatcha drinking?"

  "Blue Moon on draft," Rem and Cara said together.

  Rafe grinned. "Squeeze in with us."

  She sat down and her leg pressed against his. He loved when she dressed up, but in a casual denim skirt, cowboy boots, and a white lace top, Cara Winters was drool worthy.

  "How's Harry?" he asked grudgingly.

  She smiled. "He's doing great. He'd been at the shelter a long time, and I was afraid he'd lost hope. He's literally the sweetest dog on the planet and now he's all mine."

  The ladies sighed. Yeah, if they only knew Rem's days were numbered with the serial killer dog. "What do you do, Cara?" Sloane asked.

  "I teach special education at Sommerset. I really love working with the kids."

  Summer nodded. "I teach second grade at Lakeside. I swear, as tired as I get, those kids make it worth it."

  The women bonded, chattering nonstop and slipping into girlie subjects that Rem wanted no part of. He relaxed in the booth, drank his beer, hung with his brothers, and enjoyed being next to Cara. The heat from her bare leg practically seethed through his jeans and burned him. The scent of musk drifted from her skin. So familiar. So enticing.

  Like arousal.

  The thought skittered past his brain and stopped. His dick was so hard, it strained his pants and made sitting so close uncomfortable as hell. Was she hot for him? If he slipped his hand underneath her denim skirt and between her thighs, would he find her wet for him?

  "I heard Paul is treating you well over at Chains," Rick mentioned. "I'm glad. He's a good guy."

  Cara didn't seem too nervous that Rick knew details. Since they were all involved in the lifestyle, no one had to worry about freaking out anyone else, and they talked as openly as they would in a club. Rem always told her it was hard to keep secrets from his brothers. It would drive most women batshit crazy, but Cara loved being involved in a large, noisy family. It was another part of her he adored so much.